CASPER—A live-in caretaker for her mother, Michele Hand nearly cried from relief when she talked about the value of Casper’s new Among Friends Adult Day Center.
“It’s just such a blessing,” she said.
Between tasks like laundry and lawn mowing, house cleaning and cooking, Hand said, it was nearly impossible to give her mother, Agnes, who lives with dementia, the attention she deserves. Now she has help.
On days like this Thursday in July, Hand dropped her mom off at Among Friends. The center affords Hand a little alone time unburdened from worries about her mom’s well-being. Access to daytime care is not just good for the younger Hand, she noted.
“It’s good for mom to be around someone who’s not me,” Hand said. “They do such creative things, and she has friends.”
Agnes Hand became pals with Dorothy Sneathen the day they met at Among Friends. They’ve been glued together since. The women found each other soon after they arrived that Thursday. Even though it was likely they had forgotten one another’s names, they could recognize a friend.
Later, when they couldn’t remember the instructions they were given at craft time, it was also OK. They cracked jokes and seemed plenty entertained as they occasionally glued paper flowers to pages.
Along with the four other people attending Among Friends, they ate lunch, did chair aerobics and sang when a music therapist stopped by for a session. One man pieced together puzzles, another played with fidget toys and others participated in a memory exercise. They hugged staff and held each other’s hands.
“Giving them a little joy is so rewarding,” said Program Director Becky Bouzis.
In Wyoming, where the fastest-growing population is 65 and older, about 106,000 adults are family caregivers, according to AARP data. Unpaid caregiving can sap budgets, pull people out of the workforce and cause significant emotional distress. Family caregivers handle everything from grocery shopping to complex medical tasks, often with little training. About 80% pay out of their own pockets to meet loved ones’ needs, according to AARP.
“It’s hard, hard, hard,” Bouzis said. That’s where Among Friends comes in; the facility offers trusted respite for caregivers
“It’s just so good for people to get a break,” Bouzis said.
Family affair
Bouzis operates Among Friends with her mother, Lona Cantine. Both are registered nurses; they actually attended Casper College nursing school together in the ‘90s.
The inspiration for Among Friends grew from personal experience. Helping care for a mother-in-law with dementia, a grandmother with Parkinson’s and an uncle with multiple chronic health conditions laid bare the strains of caregiving. Juggling work is tricky, paying for in-home help is prohibitive and ensuring patients get the human connection they need is difficult.
Bouzis also had a sister-in-law who developed early onset Alzheimer’s. Before the disease took hold she was extroverted and active, Bouzis said. Once she developed it, the family wished there was a place for her to socialize. Because the disease caused her to become suspicious, in-home care failed miserably.
“We asked ourselves, ‘Why isn’t there a place she could go and find some joy?’” Bouzis said. “A place where we would know she was safe, we would know she was fed. And we could still keep our jobs and do our things with our own families.”
With backgrounds in clinical administration and neurological medicine, Bouzis and Cantine decided to create that place. They considered an in-home operation, but once they learned about Department of Health requirements, Bouzis said, they realized they “had to go big or go home.” With a larger facility in mind, they wrote a business plan, and Bouzis dovetailed it into her capstone project while earning her master’s degree.
Bouzis and Cantine found a space on Casper’s Poplar Street that has previously held a travel agency, pregnancy center and dance studio.
They gave it a full renovation, creating not just a facility that meets requirements for ADA and health department licensing, but also a destination that feels inviting, Bouzis said. “We wanted it to feel homey,” she said.
Textile art, potted plants and neutral colors help achieve that. With cabinets of puzzles and games, rows of new recliners and a large communal table, the space feels more like a contemporary rec center than anything.
Still, they stock medical and sanitary supplies, and the mother-and-daughter nurses meet required medical credentials. Employees have dementia care training, and a dozen volunteers go through background checks and training.
Bouzis’ daughter-in-law manages the kitchen, her son built the website and her father waters the plants and delivers food.
“It’s truly a family affair,” she said.
Day in the life
Among Friends runs on a daily schedule that includes lunchtime, movement, crafting and memory exercises. In that way and others, it has parallels to a children’s daycare facility.
Clients, for example, sometimes struggle with goodbye when their caregiver drops them off. Occasionally they don’t want to eat or need to rest.
Navigating such moments can require a deft touch, a kind of natural talent that certain people also display with children. The work also requires constant attention. While Cantine led a group memory activity using prompt cards, another volunteer stuck close to a client who is prone to head for the exit and distracted him when he approached the door. Bouzis, meanwhile, met with a client’s caregiver in her office.
For clients, gathering for group activities can bring out silliness and long-buried memories. Gerry Thorvaldson broke into dance when a music therapist began performing a song, and Agnes Hand joined in with her arms in the air. And, of course, there were Hand and Sneathen’s nonstop antics.
Midway through craft time, a new client arrived. The small woman with bright eyes and a deeply lined face was wheeled in by a relative.
When the relative disappeared into Bouzis’ office, Hand and Sneathen were by her side instantly, chatting familiarly and holding her hand before introductions even took place.
“You look only 29 like me!” said Sneathen. She and Hand dissolved into laughter.
Cantine explained to the client all the ways the center could make her more comfortable: snacks, drinks, activities and friends.
“This is your place,” Cantine told her.
Solution for some
A month after its June opening, Among Friends had 12 clients. The facility is available to people over the age of 50 who live at home or with caregivers and meet other criteria.
That’s not to say it’s for everyone. Some people have medical needs that go beyond the scope of its services, Bouzis said, while others get too confused or uncomfortable without their caregivers. And then of course families have to be able to afford it.
The center is currently private-pay and accepts long-term care insurance, though Bouzis said she is working to get approved for Medicaid and Veterans Affairs coverage. Fees range from $14.50-$26 an hour depending on client needs — which is less than average rates for private in-home care.
Cantine also recently launched the Still Me Foundation, which aims to financially support older adults in Natrona County with expenses that help them remain at home and independent. Still Me funds could help pay for care at Among Friends, among other expenses.
For families it works for, Among Friends has been a lifeline. Agnes Hand’s daughter, Michele, said it’s obvious to her that a lot of thought and care goes into creating a quality experience.
“It’s a very special place,” Hand said. “We’re very thankful.”
Part of the goal, Bouzis said, is to stave off two perils related to elder care. First, Among Friends keeps seniors from languishing in social isolation that is all too common for elderly folks. And second, it relieves caregivers from the mental burden of around-the-clock supervision.
Alzheimer’s, for example, can be as damaging, if not more so, on the health of the caregiver, she noted.
“If we can do anything to alleviate that for a little while for people, we’ve done our job,” Bouzis said.
