The Sage Grouse

Road Rage: Why?

What is the function of a horn on an automobile?  (The audible horn, not the Texas longhorns on the hood.)

In China, where many intersections are unmarred by stop signs, yield signs, lights, crosswalk markings; in other words, it’s a free-for-all, horns are used to let other drivers know where you are.

In Thailand, where the cars are small and they can cram five lanes of traffic into a street ostensibly marked for four lanes, and everyone is exceeding the local speed limit, horns are used to help everyone balance the flow.  It is either a miracle or the atheist equivalent thereof that one can ride in a car through such traffic for one-half hour, and no fenders are scratched, no glass is broken, no one is injured.  Horns play a useful role in this Buddha-inspired “flow like the river” scene.

But NO, in the USA, every honk of the horn is a challenge to one’s masculinity, or engine horsepower, or driving ability.  Sounding the horn is like throwing the first punch.  My god, what is it that makes these devices into a challenge for a throwdown?

Fortunately the legislature is about to repeal the requirement to qualify for a permit before you can carry a concealed weapon, so now when that redneck in the jacked-up F450 diesel with the straight stacks honks at you because you did not let him cut you off at the exit from the drive-in liquor store,  you can give him the one finger just before the hail of gunfire.

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