The January Smithsonian magazine features a hilarious sendup of apps (smartphone applications) which might have been popular in the days of the pharoahs, Hannibal and Socrates. Many involved governance and politics.  The Sage Grouse has been searching for a hook for comment on our newly-reconstituted, super-majority Wyoming Legislature, so I am borrowing the schtick: “apps” it will be.

Preface: It is my hypothesis that when nearly all of the legislators are Republicans, many or most of them are going to have to tax and spend just like Democrats if government is going to continue doing stuff. Is there an app to help Republicans emulate Democrats? I guess we will see. It happens every year anyway in Wyoming. You can’t be the “party of no” when you have actual responsibilities. But emulating Democrats across the board? Maybe not so much on certain gender-oriented topics.

Let’s see, we need to fix roads, fund municipalities, tease out energy and tax policies, help booming towns, clean up the environment, control wolves and meth, and maybe learn to manage CO2. And shouldn’t we do something about all of these tinderbox dying forests and the regrettable end of the timber industry? Is there an app for any of these?

Recall that the only reason to have a legislature at all is to create “apps,” i.e., solutions, for such problems.

But, no. NO, NO, NO!

We have to instead waste limited legislative time and ink on the possibility that five or six gay couples who were married in California or Massachusetts might come to Wyoming and imperiously demand that we respect their foreign-created status. District Court Judge Keith Kautz had one gay divorce case and now this is a crisis? How does this affect the public purse, or church attendance, or behavior in the streets or crime? Not at all.

If we want to focus on weighty social issues which do affect the public purse, together with crime and morality, let’s talk about juvenile justice. Let’s talk about how to fund guardians ad litem for troubled youth, quality foster care and drug courts. Let’s try to do something about divorce rates among heterosexuals, particularly those with children.

Is there an app for that?

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